Vulnerability = Impossibility
There is a restlessness here. Deep inside me. I long to be something, someone, yet I cannot open my self enough to let that happen. I cannot lower myself to such a vulnerable state that would allow people to see who I am. They only see who I want them to see, and yet, sometimes [..more..]
i just need to vent..
I dont know why but im feeling so disgusted in myself. i cry when i see myself int he mirror, i envy too many people. i have a draw full of paper that has day-to-day feelings of how i feel. im confused, i feel stupid but most importantly i feel like i dont fit in. [..more..]
Missing something that isn’t there any more…
If I could just put all the pictures that are in my head right now on paper… I would have the most emotional photo album of all time… At least emotional for me… I’m sure everyone has one like that in their minds. All of mine are from my home… the real home… the one [..more..]
Reality check
I love acting. It’s such a thrill and fulfilling feeling I get from sharing a story with an audience by performing it on stage. I finally got the lead role in a production of my local theater, and I thought I did so well! But when the review came out in the paper, I wasn’t [..more..]
Why.
It’s like when you think everything can’t get any worse and then suddenly it does. I’m so tired of everything in my life being perfect for a total of about five minutes. As soon as i’m settled, things begin to be okay, finally… Something goes wrong. Even if its something that isn’t even important it [..more..]
Feelings
I feel so empty sometimes. I’ve got friends and family who support me. But why is it I still feel so empty. I’m breathing and capturing every mountain I climb. With scrapes and bruises. Still emotionless. Goals, accomplishments, and pieces of paper with my marks. What significance does it have. Is it going to fill [..more..]
Better off without me
I’ve tried writing my thought s on paper but it hasn’t exactly helped. I did feel a bit better. I’ve had depression for as long as I can remember and low self esteem even longer. I’ve travelled across Australia to be at my boyfriends best friends wedding. My bf is the best man and I [..more..]
Confused
Theres this guy in my class, both my best friend and I classified him as weird last year. But this year, she started liking him! She tried getting over him becuase she didn’t have that great experience with guys. A couple weeks ago, during one of my classes, I was scribling on a piece of [..more..]
I want to write my thoughts – Does everyone think this way? Would someone want to know mine?
How can you have a day full of oxymoron’s- To feel incredibly happy and horribly disappointed – An ocean of contradicting waves-Can your feelings ever feel the same?- some things can never be the same as they once were- As hard as you try- Once paper is creased- It never can be undone- Have you [..more..]
01-02-12(0:35:17)
I CANNOT concentrate to write this paper. So much on my mind and not one thing involves trophic cascades! Damn you ecology. Who makes a writing intensive bio course ?! I can write lab reports and answer questions but I freaking essay ! When I took english in freshman year!!1 Shoot me now