Posted by Mindy1718 on 2014/11/21 under Uncategorized What the hell was I thinking staying home until my generals were done at home for college? I could of just gone to another college where I could be more free! I have a different life that I can’t even f***in control now. “Take care of mom,” or “Stay with mom so that you could help her with anything she needs.” Who the hell wants to take care of a 58 year old that knows how to take care of herself. The only f***in thing she can’t do is stay our of trouble… She drives me f***in nuts! Out of all of her seven daughters, I am the one who can’t stand her the most. Why can’t I do whatever the f*** I want huh? If I want to smoke, s***!!! Let me smoke my mouth up or let me f*** up my lungs if I want! I’m fixing her damn mess that she’s leaving. I’m suffering her own consequences because she’s all messed up in the head. Keep your own damn business away from my life. She’s a damn user. She uses people to her own pleasure and I hate the way she thinks! God dammit! She gets on my f***in nerves! One day, there isn’t even one f***ing day where we don’t even argue. I want to break down… I want to cry, she frustrates me. Everything seems so difficult because of misunderstandings and her own way of living is way too different than mines. I can’t handle her for too long. I want to get away but I don’t somehow. She needs me but I want to help her from a distance. I can’t be with her for too long and what pisses me off is that she won’t let me go because she still thinks I’m going to make the same stupid mistakes that my sister’s had done. I’m not my sisters! Why can’t most people see that, I won’t make the same stupid mistakes of just willing to anything for a man! Why do you see that in me? I’m a girl who knows better than most! I’ve seen through most of their mistakes and I won’t make theirs. It pisses me off when people compare me to someone who don’t know what’s right or people who don’t have their lives even straight! If I want to f*** up then LET ME F*** UP! I’m not satisfied… Life seems so depressing. I go to bed dreaming of what I want in life but why is it that I can never have those certain life styles that I dream? Why s*** why? F***IN F***ERS MAN! I want to do whatever s*** I want! GOD DAMMIT, HOLY S*** MAN! WHAT THE F***! F***, I HATE THIS! It hurts… My heart hurts because my life was always what I never imagine. Nothing is what it should’ve or could’ve been. Well, I guess I’m always waiting, always waiting for a change that is good. I want something that I can’t have I guess? Not everyone gets what they want. People could always wish but it won’t always work like they want… Sorry for cussing so much but thanks for having this website. bye now…