Posted by Anonymous on 2018/02/14 under Life I'm back again for what seems to be the second to the last time doing this. I know everything will go well tomorrow for the Issuance of Cards because I've been paying attention to assignments & things like that but a big part of me still believes I'll f*** up & not meet my parents' expectations. I can't wait for the time in my life where none of this will matter & I won't wake up from anxiety because of school. It seems like that's been the root of all my problems. It's not that I hate learning, I just wish our teachers were a little bit more empathetic & compassionate. I'm really cutting it close this time with Math, because that's my weakest subject. I haven't been writing down notes or doing class works or anything. I'm just holding on to the fact that I passed my PeTas. I'm really scared to f*** up but I also know that I deserve this because I don't try hard enough. My procrastination will be my own undoing. Lately there have been a lot of breakups going on around me & it's really taking a toll on one of my friends who still want their ex back. I feel so sad whenever I see the cuts on their arm. I hope they know that we're there for them & we want to be by their side when they need something. Things are wrapping up now that it's my senior year. I'm starting to notice every flaw in our school that I've been so blind to & I'm really glad we're moving up. I'll certainly miss my classmates even though I hate their mannerisms because we've been together for so long. It really feels like we're a closely knit family. There will still be things I'll be afraid of in the morning but I know I at least have the mental capacity to face them. ~Kouhai