Posted by Anonymous on 2012/10/22 under Uncategorized I thought to myself, “Be forward, but not too forward enough to make him uncomfortable. Start off small with short conversations and go on from there.” Well, I’m stupid and didn’t even consider that if he was truly interested in me, he would also put more effort to start conversations with me, both face-to-face and Facebook messaging. However, even though I initiated both, he hardly responded. In fact, I can almost guarantee that he only kept a conversation with me just because he didn’t want to be rude and ignore me. I don’t want to hate Amy because it’s not her fault. I can’t hate someone just because she’s a much more personable and prettier girl than I am who caught his attention. I can’t hate Greg because he prefers someone else other than myself. There’s no justifying any hatred toward the two simply because they like each other. …Instead, I can only hate myself for being stupid in even having a single thought that he and I could eventually form something special, even if it was a friendship. I can’t seem to ever learn that no guy that I like will ever like me back. It’s just unrealistic. You can’t tell me, “Oh, don’t worry, the right guy will find you and you two will fall in love.” That’s bulls***. There’s hardly a chance that I’ll find that one guy who I really like and he’ll so happen to have the same genuine interest. It has not happen and it will likely not happen. I wish I could just stop being a f***ing idiot and quit making the same mistake. I have had the past experience of liking a guy and him never liking me back. Why can’t I learn? And what angers me the most is that I cry because of my stupidity. How pathetic is that? I’m so pathetic.