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Posted by on 2012/05/21 under Uncategorized

I wonder if what they say is true, that us nice guys are always left in the friendzone… I tried so hard not to end up here again but you fell for him, not me, and now when you’ve broken up I’m stuck here in a nomansland without a clue of what to do next.

You know how I feel about you, I just wonder if you could ever have these feelings for me; I guess this week I’ll hopefully find out… I really hope you’ll make time to talk to me, we haven’t really talked since you got back.

I really hope that I can tell you everything about how I feel, how much you mean to me and how I wish that you would feel the same way.

But I know that’s just wishes, just dreams that I don’t dare hope for to be true. I realize that if there is even a possible litte spark that could light feelings for me, I wouldn’t be able to light it in you. I’m to scared to believe that I could. Because if you’ll tell me that it is nothing there, no feelings, no attraction what so ever, I can not have my hopes up… It would simply be to much to bare.

Everybody tells me that things will work out, that everything will be ok. And I wished I could believe them but I can’t, Because all I can see right now is a never ending black void that I will live in for the rest of my life, and the only reason I’m not having any suicidal thoughts is that this GOD DAMN little flame of hope that still burns! That forces me to hope that one day I’ll be happy because with only 18 years of my life passed it must be able to get better! But I just can’t see it…

But what I really wish I could tell you, is the fact that the only thing I wanted for the last 6 months has been to hold you in my arms, to spend every day with you, to watch the sunset with you out in the archipelago where we have our summer house even thought that sounds like such a cliché, and to tell you what a wonderful person you are and how much I love you…

Love Jacob

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