Posted by Mindy1718 on 2014/03/27 under Uncategorized I fell in love with someone at a young age and had finally told myself to let him go… I don’t want to though. He came to my heart and I want him out now… I actually really don’t though. It’s feels as though the hole in my heart would be filled if he was here but he isn’t. He said wait for me and I can’t just wait for almost 5 years anymore. It’s hard enough knowing that there are other people seeing their loves grow more while mine’s is being filled with doubt. I’ve also been seeing things fall apart from relationships too. Seeing friends break up and then another friends takes her boyfriends sucks but we usually have to get over it. I’ve actually never told anyone the story of how we met, how we started to have me wait for him, or even how we thought of how we were going to meet again… He’s about 19 right now and I’m 18. I know… Really young to fall in love but it’s true, he kept my heart beating and filled with joy, yet, the depression of knowing that he actually not be here, EVER! Who knows for sure right. I had gotten my answer that he won’t be here at all on the Sunday 23 of March. Having to plan our own life together and he wasn’t going to come back to me. It seems like I need to find someone else but, it really isn’t easy for me to just forget someone that I’ve loved at a young age til now. I know that I’ll never forget him and all the times that we’ve been together having the life that I thought that we would have. We come from different backgrounds that we shouldn’t be together for but we still went against the rules. It was fun while it had lasted and now this is the sign of giving up that relationship! A big step for me and a big story to tell to someone that never knew this story. A heart that was given out to someone for years is going to have to give it back for another person. He’ll probably give a fight but I know that I will win for I am a MexiCAN! He is a Japanese guy that won’t be together with a Mexican that looks like a white baby faced girl. I also won’t be with a Japanese short black haired, very tall, and smart guy who barely learned the meaning of true life once I had taught him. Coming from different backgrounds and teaching each other is what a relationship is supposed to do. Yes we do get in fights but we always have to correct our wrongs, even if it wasn’t our fault. I loved that man and I know that he loved me back but things aren’t progressing so things have to let go. Time to start a new life without him… I can get through this slow but surely!
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This…Made me cry…even though I don’t know you…just knowing that you’ve loved someone for all of this time just waiting on planning out your life, your future, with him and going against the grain and then having to let him go…But I know the feeling of doubt…and how it just creeps in…it happened to me and my ex..It was a long distance relationship with him being in Anguilla and me being here in Louisiana. He’s 17 nearly 18 and I’m 16. Apparently he had never been in a relationship and wasn’t exactly sure how to proceed in them? But the thing is..he was so very nice and loving. Even though distance separated us..And then he started going to college and met a childhood friend. Which of course…every time we talked after that he mentioned her and I became a bit…ehem…jealous…so I decided to end things. The night that I told him that I wasn’t exactly hurt or anything..but after i thought about what I wanted to say and i sent this long long long message…i thought about things..about not being able to tell the person that i loved/still love that i love him anymore..and then having to deal with not being able to talk to him as much anymore…it kinda hurt me..to where i was actually a bit depressed…especially since it’s kinda hard for me to open up to people and have them understand me..but that was back in December? Two months before the anniversary of our relationship? And it was a bit hard to cope at first…but here i am o: as lonely as ever! okay..that end was my lame attempt at being funny..which I’m most definitely not..
But I know that you can do it if that’s what you really want to do ^^ and you know, you’ll be happy again I sincerely hope. I know it will take a while to move on. But once you’re over this hump in life…you’ll possibly even be able to find someone else that you’ll come to love and stuffs..I dunno if this is the reply that you were looking for..and i certainly dunno if it’d make a difference in your life..and I’m sorry that I’m not the best at giving advice..but i do hate that you have to go through what you’re going through..and even though you don’t know me >.> Know that I’m sorta kinda here for you ^.^ and good luck to you <3