I’m Too Old and There Are Too Many Years In…
I am too old to quit or walk away from you. But, here we are going down that road again. I remember the last two times when you tried to assure me that nothing was going on, I was being paranoid and this is where you want to be. I remember also, the last time [..more..]
Stay Close….
I have spent the last days with so much anxiety that I feel my heart in my chest beating double time. I think things might be changing, I hope for the better. Trying to keep my faith close because I have it back and I don’t want to lose it ever again. It overwhelms me [..more..]
Time Means Nothing….
Another family reunion came around. Another one that I couldn’t go to. When the pictures are posted and I see the ex and his new wife, the smiles on your faces, I wish I was cut off from technology. No matter how hard I try to forget and go on, something shows itself. Being of [..more..]
Faith…it defines me. Lifts me up when I’m too tired to go on. Keeps me grounded. It was always such a strong part of me. I hit the bottom and when I did, I let go because I no longer felt that I mattered. So much faith, gone in the blink of an eye. It [..more..]
There’s Twenty-Three Years Put Into This….
When you’re not sure you can trust someone, how do you ever reach the point of trusting them? Can you? I don’t want it to be like this, it makes me feel immature. The first time she broke my trust, she assured me it wouldn’t happen again. She didn’t know what she was doing. I [..more..]
Why…Why Did You Do That?
They said, “give him time…he needs time to absorb was is happening.” When my father first found out, he beat the crap out of me. He actually came close to strangling me to death. The hate filled his face. His last words to me were, “I don’t want to see you again, I don’t want [..more..]
The Demons Inside
I have been searching for this kind of site for awhile. Sometimes it isn’t so easy to express your thoughts to family. The words are always the same, “it will be alright.” When you are where I am in my head, those words don’t work or help. It is coming up on a year since [..more..]