Posted by Anonymous on 2012/06/26 under Uncategorized So,
As I have said before on this… Im depressed and it really hurts.
When I began my school year, at least 3 times a week id break down.
But then a friend started helping me.
And recently I noticed its only so that she can get attention from the teachers and stuff, so I distance myself from her.
And now im having break downs more, but iv managed to do it after school…. Its okay for me since my parents are never home and my brother is the favorite in the family, so he is with them.
And I cry alone.
I avoid school so much, and I was just thinking about how much I avoid it and JUST started realizing that im stopping going to school.
I hate that I let others control me, and it makes me even more depressed.
I posted a post awhile ago saying I was finished, and I attempted to take my life, but no matter what I tried, I was only sick the next day.
I literally asked my mother, the only person in my family that really aknoledges me, “Is God’s plan for me, to live a never-ending pain filled life?” and I clearly remember her imediately calling ‘Open Doors’ and crying on the phone about the hate I hold for life and how worried she is. I hate it all.
One thought on “Just Getting It Out”
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Don’t do it, please…don’t do it. I don’t know you, and we could literally be thousands of miles apart, or we may even live in the same neighborhood, but please keep living. I know how much the depression eats you up inside, and how difficult it is to get up, or even just talk to people (trust me, I know), but please! I’m begging you to live. It’s going to be hard, but know this. There’s someone out there that cares for you, so don’t give in, and don’t give up. Honestly, you’re strong because even though you have all these feelings, you’re still alive and kicking. That in itself is a miracle. Please…live.