Posted by Anonymous on 2017/10/16 under Life i was admitted to the insane asylum. then something came over me, everything i knew up until that moment was wasted. it felt like it gave me a hope or something, to look forward to. it was so real that i was sleeping, and suddenly i woke up shaking, i couldn't control my body, i was overcome with ecstasy and i'd never felt like that before. then years later, i saw a strange dream. it was linked to what happened to me at the asylum. nobody knows about the asylum, but they knew of the dream cos i was telling everyone because i was hoping to find what started it at the asylum. yea, things sorta fell apart. i mean, i wasn't even sure i remembered everyday that i made myself the promise of pursuit of whatever the heck that was. i guess i made an intention so strong that it destroyed everything in my way.something that is not in my character btw, so even i didn't know how to handle it.but of course, my earthly senses at that time and place were preoccupied with the immediacy of the urgent care around me. though little did i knew that broken life had me oblivious to caring for myself at all. i forgot, or never new that i was missing chunks of it. you know i questioned why me.i think everyone does at some point in their lines. it's one of those cliche lines when s*** goes wrong. and you're so sure you got your s*** together but in reality you're nowhere near it. so you're like, seriously, why me. i wasn't ready for it. but my intention knew the way. that's strange. because i may have admitted myself to the asylum and it's probably because i was body dismorphic that i was interested in wanting to see how i could morph my body, but somehow it scared me that maybe i was adrift in thoughts i didn't know existed. maybe i wanted to feel something.and at that point, how can one say that a dream feels more real than reality itself. that it gives you that push to have something to look forward to when all else bleak. you can't even tell nobody cos it's crazy, maybe you're crazy. but if the shoe fits right?
i can only imagine the turmoil of someone seeing me lose my s*** and not be able to help with any of it. na i am talking about way back when we had motorola razor phones and arguing about who knows what.
i see letters when i close my eyes i see letters letters etched inside my eyes.
from time to time, you let the crazy out. but i will tell you something, if i haven't said enough,
2 thoughts on “ramblings a la random”
Leave a Reply Cancel reply
This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.
room full of mirrors bounce around the light
deciphering meanings of all and the like
how does it feel when you read when you see when you feel what you feel and you realize it
no i didn’t see anything, it was just a feeling, years maybe months? how can you tell yourself not to forget a feeling? how can you not forget. do you put it inside your heart, and when the time comes, open your heart and then remember? what happens when you die and then you’re resurrected. or your next life. you’re like what then? how do they translate into the new world the new you, how can we remember and not remember, ever so true? you know often times, when a bad things happened, i would brush it off and say it’s ok was it because of the environment that we say and do what we do and say. why do people go through so much measure to lie and stay. but you my friend, i am so f***ing glad you are here today. thank you.