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Posted by on 2013/01/22 under Uncategorized

I come from a haunted past, something that I cannot get over no matter how hard I try. Because every single day, Josie comes back into my mind. And I will never forget what I saw. Josie was my older sister. Smart and blonde and skinny. All the guys loved her. And then one day.. something went wrong in Josie’s head. And she started hanging out with the wrong crowd. And she came home with her hair dyed black and she always smelled like cigarettes. It was hard to watch her like that. On a Tuesday after school, I come home, expecting to find her. I yell her name a million times. And then I run up to the bathroom. And I see her dead body. And I remember not being able to scream. Tears just rushed down my face. I was thirteen years old, and had no idea what to do. I called 911 and my mother and then I fell to the ground shaking. I will never forget that day. And after years of therapy, things have just gotten worse. Because Josie never left a reason, or a note. She never said goodbye and I think that is what kills me the most. Why was she so sad that she had to reach this point? I think about her every day. But I just can’t remember her as the loving blonde that she used to be. I have to remember her as the troubled girl who killed herself. And that breaks me apart. I love you Josie.

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