Today.

Today i don’t feel very good. My mind has just been racing, spinning and crashing. i didn’t go to work today but i don’t want to be home. I cannot think of a single place i want to be. I like being home, or at my parents, or my friend’s place. but i just want [..more..]

31-08-11(14:55:31)

ideas, wishes, creativity… it’s all there, it’s already been there for a long time. but still… i don’t know how to channel all that stuff and finally get the job i want. the future i want. it’s harder than it looks and it feels like a constant struggle i don’t want anymore. i don’t want [..more..]

11-08-11(9:59:30)

I kind of dont feel real anymore … i feel like one night i’ll go to sleep and then ill just wake up and a new life will be waiting for me. But isnt that Death? Will i just move on and my soul will pass to another body? what i dont understand is that [..more..]

My favorite color, powdered white, In a circle that can free me from this everlasting struggle. Half makes it easier to sleep, and to wake, Two takes me to the motherland where i fall and die, I slip into an eternal sleep; The one place where i am not afraid.