Posted by Anonymous on 2014/10/01 under Uncategorized Typical depression post. Life is tiring. Can’t get started on anything. Don’t wanna do anything. Feel like a failure. I am a failure. People tell me I am a failure. I can only f***ing cry. Of course, secretly. I hate people.. I want to run away. On the other hand… I love you..I want to see you. I want to touch you. I want to have sex with you. now…I want to cry in your arms. lol. I know you probably don’t think the same way of me. You’re probably fantasizing about having sex with a hotter girl you see every day unlike me. What am I to you? A toy? For this freaking long of a time? Why don’t you talk to me? Do you want to talk to me? I’m afraid to talk to you. I was afraid of you. Right now I love you too…But we are people who are never allowed to be together. Yet we will probably have to witness each other’s weddings. I’m lonely and cold…I had a dream about you, with you two days ago. It was so realistic that when I woke up, I thought the waking up part was the dream. How sad I was when I realized the truth. What is truth? Our relationship will probably stay hidden for all of eternity. Will we have secret meetings when we’re older? I miss you. I was so sad when we couldn’t do anything two months ago. Then I was even sadder one month ago when I thought I was going to see you but couldn’t. That time, I couldn’t hold my tears very well. When will I see you next? Probably in my dreams…at least until two months later…it’s soo long. Why is the vacuum so freaking loud? Shut up! arghh. I’m going to be mentally insane…haha forgot, I am already! Caused by not being accepted by parents, having to act perfect all f***ing day, and the lack of love from my parents and you. Friends? What does that word mean? I used to have one. I loved her more than you. I thought I’d never go back to you because I loved her so much I just want to see you, and have sex with you. Then, I think I’m going to go die. A gun seems painless. Or a car accident but that would cost my dear parents money…should I run away before dying? I’d like to go to Europe before dying. I’ll be a prostitute and then die. Seems reasonable. im insane im insane im insane. I probably will not kill myself. I’ve had suicidal thoughts on and off since the seventh grade. I’m still not dead. Which means I probably won’t die. As much as I wished that I didn’t wake up this morning, I work hard to try to act like a normal, perfect human being. It’s killing me. lol.
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Not bad. Could kind of relate, but only at a small degree. Although I do have the same destination as you before I die. Which part of Europe ? I would want to visit Greece. Anyways, if you want to be a perfect human being, then you have to be dead o;
Because the perfect human being is a dead one. It doesn’t think.
Don’t worry, someone will eventually come to you and will help you with your troubles. But you have to do your part as well, which means exploring! 😀
Explore and you can find great things. Good luck.
P