Posted by Anonymous on 2013/07/10 under Uncategorized To be honest this is going to be my first time writing something on here.. Ive been sort of down lately.. like I’m starting to feel an uneasy feelin’ in my stomach.. like my stomach is in knots. and well, to my stupidly mind I let him have a another chance.. (i believe i love him..) and well, so ever since that day he and i talked a lot till like a few weeks ago.. he started to slowly stop talking me, and now its gotten to the point where we only just sleep on skype now.. to be honest i don’t know why but i need him in order to sleep, i think its because i feel a bit safer hearing his soft voice, ’cause well, i get nothing but nightmares when i sleep alone (i do not know why..(i wish i do though)) well ever since he slowly stopped talking to me i’ve been getting more and more nightmares even when sleeping with him now.. it worries me. and on top of that on july 19 i’m leaving to my aunts house so i wont be able to skype him at night till sept. and i wont be able to talk to him either because i’m going to be too busy working.. :/ so, i’m trying to slowly tell him that i really need him, but.. its not working really, and all he had to say to me last night was “what do u want me to say?” “i dont know what to say” “;-;” …it bothered me.. and all of you might say “why don’t you just tell him how u feel deep inside??? i mean he should understand!!” — well to those who might say that, i’m too scared to tell him.. i mean he’ll just get depressed and tell me to find someone better than him.. i mean I’ve never felt this way with a guy before like the feeling of true true love.. but for some reason now its turning worried worried paranoia.. which its scaring me.. i don’t know.. by the way my nightmares are about death.. basically either me dying or losing someone close.. also.. another thing about my bf, my friends keep calling him a d*** for how hes acting towards me and that i should either yell at him or tell him that he should start acting like a real boyfriend.. and they point out good reasons for me to tell him off, but.. its hard to say something about it to him.. i’m too scared that i’ll lose him.. maybe i’m just over reacting… …for now i just keep quiet and just smile about everything.(surprised i haven’t hurt myself by now.)
I just need to vent some but I feel like typing it out instead of sitting there with a piece of paper in front of me.. (no judge please ;-;)
well, ok..
and i have a feeling its because my boyfriend..(which I hope not..)
and well..about my boyfriend.. him and i have been together for a about i guess u can say a good two months.. and well, things have happened that make me worry about him alot..like.. well he has cheated on me once with a guy..(sadly with my own ex…)
to be honest i cried to him last night telling him, that he seems different and that its bothering me.. and hes been talking less and less to me.. (and what i mean by acting different by hes acting like a chick.. making me think that hes cheating on me with another guy..)
and then i get upset.. i don’t want to lose him ya’know..? like hes been there for me for years.. and him and i have been through soooooo much, like him and i have been friends for 2-3 years and are now dating since beginning of may.(which i’ve been waiting to date him for sooooo long)
5 thoughts on “i dont know what to think.. (a vent..)”
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First thing of all, you can write on this site as much as you want. As I see it, the comunity here is very nice and tolerantical. No judge, yo. Second thing, hurting yourself won’t help in any matter. That’s like drinking it off with alcohol. It’s not the right way. Thirdh thing, if you feel like you have a problem in your life and however desperate you are (I know those feelings you have. The stomach thingy-totally a syndrom) you still have to get yourself together and be a real worrior woman. And don’t pity yourself. Pity is bad. Just talk with your friends or someone really close so you would get to the conclusion on this matter. And then if you will want to try to talk with your boyfriend and he still keeps the same attitude, then say you need a “time out”. I just call it a “time out” cause you’re scared of losing him, right? Well, if he actually loves you back, he’ll want to be together with you. And if not, then why would you want to hurt yourself by being to someone who doesn’t love you back? As much as true love sounds beautiful and only one time in your life, it happens again. And every time you’ll think that the previous love was fake. Truth is, they’re all real. So don’t let your chin down. I believe in you. *hugs*
Thank you so much.. yeah i might use website a bit more often. and ok i wont.. and yeah i understand everything you said though thank you so much, i feel a lot better now. ill try my hardest to try to fix things and see what happens.
Thank you so much.. yeah i might use website a bit more often. and ok i wont.. and yeah i understand everything you said though thank you so much, i feel a lot better now. ill try my hardest to try to fix things and see what happens. *hugs back*
I’m very happy to read that. Do your best, girl.
You are amazing without him. You are beautiful darling. You are pretty. You are striking. Your life isn’t his- its yours. Ya know, There is a guy out there waiting to meet somebody just like you. *Hugs* Well everybody is giving group hugs so why not?