Posted by Anonymous on 2015/06/06 under Uncategorized Why do I all of a sudden think about him?
I have a partner and I love him more than the world, and I would be devastated if something would happen to him. I would even die for him, and no, I am not exagerating. I have thought many times, that if something would happen, I would just cut my wrists and drown myself on the river. I’ve had this thought many times, I am so afraid to lose him. I have lost my father already, I am afraid to lose my dearest of all.
But what I don’t understand, why do I think so much lately about him, a past love. He hurt me, he took advantage of me but I loved him. Even if it’s over, I think of him sometimes. It’s a mixed feeling, of how I would like to take revenge on him or how I would react if he would be here.That damned lust, that could never happen, how much I wished him before. But he’s not here, I am curious what he’s doing now… Just curious, I would never want to be with him. What is he doing now? maybe he has kids already? maybe he found someone to toy like he did with me…
But why after three years, do I suddenly start thinking about him? I was only a toy for him,I realize it now. Even if it felt real before. It was just easy entertainment for him…
Why can’t you get out of my head already, you damn pervert basterd?