Posted by Anonymous on 2015/01/29 under Uncategorized You lie in bed. That feeling of sadness. Oh, that overwhelming sadness. You lie there in self pity, and everything flashes before your eyes. The good memories, the bad ones. But, the thing that frustrates you, is that the good memories seem to just fade away, and there’s nothing but the worst of memories left. You’re stunned, but you soon remember that you’re extremely cherophobic. You just can’t enjoy the goodness that life has to offer. Whenever a good thing happens, you know an unfathomly horrific tragedy is to follow. So, the good memories, they’re still present, but the feeling that a cherophobic person feels at those amazing moments, those feelings just take over the whole memory. The feeling of anxiety, sadness and depression. There’s nothing but pain. Nothing… You lie in bed listening to your songs. You listen to the same songs over and over again. Over and over again, because they make sense. Or maybe you just don’t wanna listen to new songs; you don’t wanna explore. You’re scared. Your playlist is a rollercoaster of emotions. It makes you smile, cry, and sometimes it makes you put your hand on your heart and say, “This time will pass. It will pass. I will be fine. It will pass…” So, you just listen to your old songs. You’re in your own world. I love when that happens. You lie in your bed. As you lie down, staring at the ceiling, you think of everyone you know. Your friends mainly. You think of everyone who’s hurt you, intentionally or unintentionally. There comes a time when you just lose count. You don’t think bad of the people who hurt you. Instead, you think that maybe you’re a bad person. Your true, honest friends tell you how amazing you are, but you don’t pay any heed to what they say. Conclusion: You’re a bad person. A very bad person. You lie in your bed. You don’t know what to do. You aren’t able to make any desicions, because your mind is filled with thoughts of every kind. You feel worthless. Among those thoughts, you focus on one thought. “You should kill yourself”, but you don’t. You can’t. It’s not because you value your life, it’s because you care. You care about the people who actually love you, no matter how few in number they are, they do love you, and you hate that. You hate those people. You think, “Why do they love me?” You hate them for loving you. They just complicate things up. You lie in your bed. Thinking about life, love, friends, songs, lies… EVERYF***INGTHING. You look at the time, it’s time to get up. You realise that you’ve been crying all the time. You get out of bed,stand up, grab a few tissues and wipe your face. You breathe deeply, in and out. You look in the mirror, and smile. You think, “This time will pass. It will pass”. You open your bedroom door and walk out. You get back to your life. When people look at you, they think, “He’s lucky. He has such an easy life!” Little do they know what you go throught everyday. They’re naive. So, so naive.
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