Somewhere To Write

Posted by Anonymous on 2014/05/11 under Uncategorized

My life is crumbling away not just because of the break up.. my family. I’ve lost some of the most important people on my life..
Uncle because of problems that he had, owing out money.. he liked to drink but he was more than a father to me, everything I know is from him, how to care and love is all from him..
My sister due to asthma.. I still blame myself for it because she died in my room.. I couldn’t hear her crying, it was silent..
My grandmother due to a bone stuck in her trachea and she lost breathing..
Im not going to name everyone ive lost, but these 3 constantly come to my mind when im thinking.. I miss them all so much and I loved them all a lot. I don’t know what to do.. I think I have to go on a walk with music and to clear my head again.. I could drink or smoke weed but that will be no help, once Im sober I will remember it all. Im constantly fighting with my parents and I don’t know why.. I just want it all to f***ing stop because I cant handle it anymore.. the slightest things are pissing me off for example these f***ing red lines under words I am typing.. id would love for everything just to end.. id love to just go tell everything for someone and all of these thoughts just leave my head.. Im constantly getting bugged by something and I don’t know what.. I started to take jokes seriously now idk if its me being 18 or not, I don’t want any fun in my life anymore I just want it all to f***ing end ..

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