I honestly have no clue what I’m doing right now. I used to know who I was, but that all changed. Tell me do you know what it’s like to wake up every morning and have motivation to do nothing, to not know who you are? Do you know what it’s like to be happy only to stay up in the late hours of the night realizing you’re fooling yourself. I don’t feel safe at “home” (my dorm) honestly it’s like a competition. I need help. I don’t know what I’m doing or where to go from here. I don’t feel good enough for anyone, and honestly all I want is to be loved. I want to have that one person to turn to when I’m like this, but I’m alone. People look at me and say “You’re so pretty, and smiling all the time” and I smile some more and laugh a bit, while inside I keep shattering and I want to cry and yell and say HELP ME. I’m tired of picking myself up alone, this is hard and part of me just wants to lay here. I need help. I’m starting to numb up, someone help me.
can you see yourself as an egoist?
if you can, right now, think about what you can take from life right now. because it sometimes feels to me like that’s all I have left now- life.
you have to reach for things. the way you reach yourself, intimately. The importance of things depends on nothing, in times of life, but times change, just like the seasons. here’s some love, in the only way I can express it, bad with the words, but honest in my intent.