Posted by Anonymous on 2013/02/19 under Uncategorized I don’t know what to expect from writing my disposition. Sounds girly to me. One thing I learned, silence is Golden. I learned experiences that make the heart glad. Like love to a stranger, or silence when people are rude. This world is full of opinions. Discerning people make a lot of opinions, but who truly understands a thing? There’s those, who I include myself with, that form opinions to contribute something good, to look clever. I do that, but feel fake or awkward when I choose to do that. I’m just glad I’m aware of it, but then maybe sometimes maybe it’s that way. Intentions could be honest and one would still look presumptuous. There has been a lot of misunderstandings cause of that. Maybe that’s why the Teacher(GOD) said don’t judge, because you’ll be judge with the same measure you judge. There’s times where judgement could be cloudy. I feel there’s something about love. Love is deep and indescribable, but I think it’s one of the best things we are able to do. Especially towards the Heavenly Creator. I don’t know about love. Well maybe I do. I just don’t know how to approach it. Or create it. This is how I see love, longing for that soft voiced, sensitive creature that loves to be around. Wanting that person, all of her. Then there’s love I felt with my dad. My family. I remember a love that was spectacular when I was a boy. Her name was Am. It was an innocent love, nothing sexual, lying, there was some tension from my part. I was kissing her on the cheeks, hugging her, sitting her on my lap, holding her hand and always feeling her right next to me, wherever. If she wasn’t next to me, I would get jealous and start wondering where she was. She was always telling me I look good and that she loved me. Damn she used to say it alot, more than 5 times under 10 minutes for at least 4 months. She conquered me without knowing, or willing. I treated her like I didn’t like what she was doing but personally liked it. I longed and waited for her to be affectionate. She always made the first step, chasing after me, getting jealous when I looked at other women. I like it all, the jealousy, the affection, the sweet sounds from her mouth, her wanting to be with me all the time. And she was really pretty. Before her, women wasn’t a big deal to me. After her, women became my center.