Posted by Anonymous on 2015/02/28 under Uncategorized Back in 2011 I was super suicidal, I never let anyone know my emotions and never told anyone about the horrific things I was doing to myself.
Its been 4 years since that but the whole events have just sprung back into my mind and I can’t seem to get rid of them, I’ve been through too much; abuse as a child, my own mother having depression and it rubbing off on me, I moved house/school at the prime of my childhood causing me to loose all friendship id ever built up over those years I was there.
When I came to the place I currently live, I was alone, I had nobody, I spent the first years of my life here with no one to talk to, causing me to eat my emotions instead and that lead to me being an obese child.
Not many of my friends know this, but in the early stages of 2014 I was “diagnosed” with bulimia, and I’ve been in an awful state of mind since, I dropped a few stone in weight since I was a little girl but unfortunately, suffering with bdd messes your brain up obviously, so now I constantly say how I’m fat and ugly, because whenever I look in the mirror, I see 10 year old me; fat, disgusting and just plain ugly, though many will see me constantly looking in mirrors but that’s just a fear factor, of the fear I don’t look “on point”.
But all the thoughts from 4 years ago seem to have all trailed back, and I’m right back where I began…
One thought on “I’m right back where I began…”
Leave a Reply Cancel reply
This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.
i understand how you feel i grew up without a dad i started starving myself and cutting when i was 13 i didnt know where i belong if you need someone to talk to my email is <a href="mailto:[email protected]" >[email protected] please feel free to open up im here to open up too