My biggest secret is that I’m f***ing terrified of the future. I’m terrified of what’s going to happen to me, what’s going to happen to my parents, my brother… I’m scared because I don’t know and I don’t have any control of what’s going to happen. And I won’t know until then. I’m feeling so overwhelmed and scared I just want to sit down and cry. I haven’t felt like this in a long time. I pray the depression isn’t coming back. I don’t want to relive that. I’m so scared. And I can’t tell anyone.. I’m too venerable.