The one person, my Mother, that I only ever truly trusted. Commited suicide. I don’t think that there is really an answer on how to re-learn everything. But it seems that trusting people is now my biggest problem.
I can’t understand this. How am I supposed to trust anyone? Why does it seem like people feed off of others feedback to move forward in life? It feels like everything said or done is hoping for a reaction or something else spoken to spur myself to feel a certain way. It seems that I can’t really remember how I am supposed to function, and everything that I say or portray is simply a learned act from before my Mom died, on May 16 of this year.
I suppose being aware of this is the biggest step. Time to go re-learn how to be…how to live. I need to re-learn how to live, and not carry on simply surviving and doing things only for self-preservation.