i just dont know what to do anymore. iam 19 years old and to be honest i believe that am such a pussy coward. nobody in the world knows this secret only you guys now, i have retrograde ejaculation_ meaning that my sperm goes back to my bladder ones i ejaculate. my testicles are extremely small, am so ashamed of my self. i smoke weed to forget that ihave this problem and weed makes me happy, i just cant tell my mom cz she probably would die of a hart attack and i just cant look at my brothers eye and tell him my problem. i know that ones i confront my problem and i get heal i can live a normal and happy life. this s*** problem its just holding my back, i dont even have my lisence yet my parents tell me everyday to study but i just dont give a s*** cz i know am sick and i just feel like smoking weed and forget about it. i just want this to be over already but am to afraid to confront my problem am such a coward and i feel so quilty. one time i went to this party with my bestfriend and to girls where like show me your d*** and i just couldent do it, how the f*** with this mall testicles. i just dont have balls to really do nothing.