i dont know what is it that happened to me at all. i think i lost myself somewhere in the past couple years im not me anymore i dont do things i used to i dont act like i used to i do things id probably hate to do i say things i never say. ive been like i never have. my interests my life myself has become so shallow to an extent ive become one of the most boring people ive ever known . i dont draw anymore, i stopped writing by all means i take s*** 4 granted and the most intresting topics to me now would probably be wasting money, travel, and abbs. i dont even eat with pahion i just eat for the sake of eating its like i live just to pass time. maybe im thinking its just a phase thatll go away but its not going away on its own, its taking alot of me (or whoever i used to be) with it. or Maybe this is a growing phase like developing a new personality you know its so sad when ppl talk about deep things I actually laugh at them in my head.
you know I wish I could ever have someone to talk to, to say anything i want to without thinking ill be judged by it not only that but i think im afraid ill ruin the image ive been building in peoples eyes of this very strong girl who doznt give a s*** about how hard life can be and just lives every moment to the fullest,, except im not living every moment to the fullest im living this boring life where all i try to do is pretend.