So i’ve been home for about 3 days now, I didn’t tell my friends at uni that I was going back and i’ve had no contact from any of them. I always thought I was being stupid when i thought no one cared, obviously I was wrong. There is no point in my being, just a waste of time, money and space that other successful people should be given. The only stopping me from killing myself is the realization that once I’m dead, that feeling of relief, knowing that it’s all over, will never come. Once you’re dead, you feel nothing. I don’t want that, I want the feeling of relief, the knowledge that ‘everything’s going to be OK’ and I cant achieve that through death.