Is she ever going to love me the way I want to be loved? I doubt it. She’s f***ed up and it’s partly my fault. I can’t sleep and I was rejected for Valentine’s Day. I’m sure if we end up together I’ll be forgotten over and over again. I always am. Nobody actually loves me enough to make me feel special or seen. Never. So I’ll lay alone and cry or lay next to someone and cry always. I don’t want this. I hate it. Forever alone no matter who I’m with.