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Emotions have never made much sense to me the moment I feel is the moment in which I cannot comprehend. It is because of this I toss emotion aside it is much easier to live without it. To remain intelligent, rational. Get mixed up in emotion and all that disappears all I can think of is it all I can attempt to understand is it. I become a fool trying to piece it together to somehow understand in vain as in the end my conclusion is… I don't know. So I cannot accept the simple truths, I cannot express my realities. To show you what I feel would be impossible as I do not comprehend myself. Yet, slowly I am able to come to some conclusions however it may be even more difficult to accept them. But, here is one thing I want to accept as I have been in a haze due to denying it. I miss you. I want you to be here with me. I wish we can go on adventures as you wish, it would be a dream. But… it cannot happen. There is much I must do and you are not my ultimate goal. No, I believe there is so much more to life so many more things I can and want to do. So I must pursue them, if not I will waste away. So we may not see one another for very long and perhaps we will grow apart. I know you don't want it, you are a romantic. I knew to be involved with a romantic would be dangerous but I never thought I would get so caught up in it all. I often think I do not even like you that much, but if so why do I long for you. Is it boredom? I doubt it, yet as usual I don't know. What I do know is much more simple as when it comes to emotion that is all I can comprehend. I miss you, I long for you at times, I want to see you again and be fools together, but I will do what I must as what we have is not my priority I must look forward and if we meet again I will be so glad but if we don't I will remember you as the oddity I grew accustomed to.