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Lost

I dont know what I am doing. I am becoming a horrible person. I have a boyfriend who is really kind and loving but all my past relationships have been abusive and horrible. It feels like i am starting to miss them because the guys where so not caring about anything but still loved me but they were just badass. Now a guys flirting with me and im not flirting back but im not stopping it so i dont know what to do. i feel terrible..

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