I sometimes feel like we're mean to be, but other days show me something different. It's hard going day by day without asking myself what am I doing with myself and my time. I spend it doing nothing and wasting on things that aren't important to me and make me better. But yet I want so much. Me and him have so much things for us but just in it for us. I don't want to let go but I don't know myself. It's hard not knowing what you want in life. I want to be happy and be proud of myself for the thing's I do but yet nothing. I remember when I said telling myself everything I was going to do and make happen by the end of month, I just cant take it no more.