hello. it has been a solid 7 years since i got on this website. i am familiar because the last time i was here i left a s***ty poem about some middle school crush i had on some guy. anyways, i ended up going here again because i was curious about said poem. i guess for the last few days i have just been longing really hard for the past. i took those days for granted, when home wasnt hell and when life wasnt such a chore. i long for nothing more than to wake up as a bird so i can fly far, far away.
the pandemic trapping everyone in their homes hasnt been nice to me. school has been s*** because online classes dont f***ing work and my grade conscious self is having a mental breakdown over it internally, but my body refuses to work. the government does not give a s*** about anyone here. i dont think they plan to fix things up and would instead keep us locked up here to continue hoarding loans and wealth or something. i hate it. i feel, so so hopeless. i want all of this to be over soon, because i physically cant do anything at all. i know a lot of people are probably dealing with worse things now under the lockdowns, and god does that weigh down on my thoughts every night as well. f*** this, dude.
here's to hoping i don't wake up tomorrow.