I've had this feeling for quite a while now, but I'm not sure how to describe it. I just feel physically dirty. When I am feeling like this, I try to comfort myself by imagining that I'd be a little ball.
And for some reason, I imagine the ball as yellow. Not a neon, or a really bright shade, actually a little orange-ish.
The thought of being a perfectly round, clean aesthetic object truly makes me calm inside.
I just felt like sharing this experience with somebody.