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The wasted years of an alcoholic

Time stands still as i sit outside the nightclubs
Twenty years passed by in a blink
Everything has changed but i feel exactly the same
Tears roll down my face as i sniff away the pain
So many opportunities that faded away
The near misses
Katie, Lucy, Haley, Zoe.
I`m left totally alone
i wish i kept one of you as a friend.
I wish i was sober enough to tell you were not into me
i wasted my life chasing you
Where do women go in their 30s?
they seem to vanish into air
Its 8am and nothing is open
A man in fluorescent yellow cleans the street with a machine
I`m crying as rain spatters on the ford car
The windows mist up as i sit and look out making sure no one sees me cry
I`m crying for the time i lost and will never get back
So many dreams so many near and far
Now i`m old and i wonder where she is
how depressing how all these dreams never happened
All those wishes never came true
The substitute a cheap thrill
Wasting all my wages on clubbing cigarettes and alcohol
while wiser men saved for a house
All the chances i failed to act on
The joke was always on me
i was the joke but could never see
I look at a clock and count years
Time is still, still yet i never aged
never grew to the man i should have been.

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