I wonder if you could see the times that I thought I was showing you that I cared.
A time that sticks in my mind is when one of the puppies from that litter died.
We knew it wasn't doing well, but we both had faith that it was going to pull through. When we realized that it had passed we both started crying. What you didn't see is that I sucked mine back up and made myself stop, I wanted to stay strong for you. I wanted you to cry and not worry about comforting me. I wanted you to cry on my shoulder. I wanted to stay strong and be your strength.
I'm sorry for the way we ended. I hate myself for it. I was horrible and I'm still being horrible. You will never see this and that is okay. You have moved on, that's wonderful and I am happy for you. I hope you have a wonderful life. You deserve that. I'm just so sorry for everything. I am not good I know that.
I'm sorry for the late f***ed up ways of showing that I care. I know they are not needed. I'm sorry if I made everything about me. I'm sorry.