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11-03-12(2:05:01)

I’m not going to sit here and act like my life is horrible, because it’s not horrible. I have a great family and friends, but when it comes to finding a person to love and care about me.. it never works. I don’t understand why no one wants to love me or be in a relationship with me. My family and friends say it’s because people are intimidated by me, and that boys find me out of reach. I mean, I know I deserve someone, but I find it hard to believe that’s the reason. It hurts so bad to feel like you are not wanted by anyone in the world. Well, I finally found someone who had interest in me. I really liked him, he’d talk to me all the time. He’d flirt with me, ask me to hang out. I am completely comfortable with him. We are completely comfortable with eachother. He would tell me he liked me, and he knew I liked him. We finally went on a date, we kissed. It was fun, and easygoing. Amazing, perfect. I thought I finally found someone to be with. Obviously, being in highschool, I wasn’t expecting him to be my soul mate. He just made me feel so great. I just felt so loved and wanted for once. But it turned out he didn’t want a relationship with me, he just wanted someone to mess around with. I told him that I wasn’t here just to give him everything I had for nothing in return, because that wasn’t happening. Now, I never made it clear that I was wanting a relationship, so i couldn’t just simply blame him and cut him out of my life. So, we are still friends and talk.. he still flirts. But it’s hard to just sit there knowing that we will never be anything more than that. I just don’t understand why I was only simply good enough for him to get with, but not good enough to date? Well, I guess time will heal his hurt. And one day,i believe that I WILL find someone. I still have hope, and everyone on here should never give up hope either. It’s the greatest strength you can have.

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