I used to believe the world was always against me. That the cloud of inadequacy that followed me was caused by he, she, and them. But, now I see it was always me. I can accomplish things that impress others and do what I never thought could be done. The seemingly impossible could be made possible. I would get a day of light but after that, the cloud would return, and the gloom would overtake my mind. I would get a feeling that despite it all I have done I still do not deserve the praise and I do not deserve the applause. No matter what I do I will always be weak and my mind will always destroy itself. But, the one upside is that now I see perhaps it was them who started the thought but it was me who allowed them to infiltrate my mind and rob my joy, I allowed the thought to be real. It was me how heard these critiques and kept them causing them to occur. So, now it's no longer them who have done this to me the world is not trying to destroy me, it is myself who destroys me. Despite knowing this the issue will remain as now there is the question; How do I stop myself from believing I am inadequate and unworthy?