,..,

i feel sad now, which is part of life i guess. it's not a stranger to me, to be this way at times, and that's fine. i try not to talk too much about some of the sensitive subjects, for they are very core of some things. i feel i must protect them with all i have right now. otherwise, i maybe in grave danger. maybe not anymore. maybe there was no danger, but i can't take the risk for it. so i know it must play on the heart strings for it's a sensitive subject, which is why it's not, maybe it sorta fails to express the true essence. tho i hoped it did, and that maybe it would later. there's a reason i have to be this way. right now. right here, for all the information here is monitored by the admins and the invisible creatures of the night. i am on guard, my winds are ready for flight. yes, you hit a very big vein with that. it leads to life force and some structural matter as well as some point of orign. tho i dont know what you exactly expect me to say. all is fine.maybe it's you who's worried a bit. feeling shame, or guilt or both. thse are not my feelings because i am full of joy. maybe now im a bit blue but don't be alarmed of that. a little blue so what. you are fine, you are more than fine, but not too much, you are enough, maybe just right, ok u see, whatever i say i ma get me in trouble. cos its that sensitive i kw the mechanism of whihc ur looking through. i did that on purpose to throw off the big brother and his big giant eye i donno. i dont thik it matters now cos ur happiness matters most, and i can't seem to relay the info any other way it seems. i guess it's one of those scenarios where truth prevails and so f*** it.. we are going super micro right now which is proabbly why it hurts so much. pleae be happy god what can i do to make u happy ok now im making demands ok just be u whatever it is it will pass