Sitting in my bed in my apartment…looking around and seeing how empty it is now. Everything is almost moved out..thinking back on how we leased this apartment together and how everything here is a memory of us. This apt, this city, how and where we met. I will never forget. But it hurts..it hurts knowing that I will never forget and I will be reminded of you everywhere I go and in everything I do. Someone told me the other day..its the living that suffers not the dead. The living are the ones that has to live on with a piece of their heart missing. In a way I feel relieved because I was worrying about you. I hope that you are ok wherever you are. Even though I have to live on with a piece of my heart missing as long as you are okay I think I can manage. Youre what's important to me. I hope you know that. But its hard my love..its hard for me to live on without. You made me so dependent on you that for once in my life Im scared..Im scared to have to go on without you holding my hands in the upcoming days, months, years to come. I know..I cant even believe it..Ive always been strong but I feel so weak right now without you.