I thought that by the time I got to college I would be living my true life. But I’m the same as I’ve always been. It's not as if I can decide to just start living my life because I don’t even know what that looks like. It's just desperately sad.I don’t think it's wrong that I don’t want to be around people. It doesn't people wrong. I mean it's just introversion. But at the same time, i'm just so painfully lonely. I want someone to get me but I don’t think that anyone ever can. I’ve lived with my parents for 19 years and they still don’t yet me. Ugh that sounds so emo and then again maybe they do get me but It doesn't matter because I don’t feel any more fulfilled. Maybe it's depression because I feel so numb but I'm slow to believe that because I don’t feel sad. It doesn't feel wrong. It feels like I'm the only person who understands this world. I realise that can't be true. I don’t have a purpose but I know that’s not wrong. It's who I am. I over think and I've thought everything through but who I am can't be wrong. It isn’t wrong. It just doesn't make me less lonely.