im young. i dont know if this is love i dont think so? otherwise i would be in my bed hiding still, But im a tough girl when everyones around but when im on my own or just thinking, i feel upset and think i miss him, i was with this boy for 6 months i treated him abit crap but only because he went against everything i said but he kissed up to me and stuff, he hit me now and then i took it as a joke and try not to accept that he hit me. i was so happy with when i was with him? but i dont know if im just thinking that i was because ive broken up with him for two months now, because i remember when i was with him i just him to leave as soon as he got at my house, and when we broke up i kissed 2 boys i phoned him up crying my eyes out and he laughed? and im so dumb he left little hints and stuff, and my freind goes i wish i could tell you stuff about him but i cant i got it out of her. he had sex with anouther girl, while he was texting me. and it sickens me because that nigth in the morning he went back to mine and then we had sex. and i remember him telling me then.. oh i slept at my mates house and there was this girl there.. but dont get mad! i slept in the other room. wait, not only that the girl who told me also told me two girls have him head, and he fingerd girls a different night, and he only admitted having sex with this girl when we broke up. i was like right thats it man up! i went out for a drink at the girls house who told me about it all. this other girl in the kitched told me more. the girl who told me everything my bestmate did i mention? ALSO had sex with him and told me my other bestfriend had sex with him too, i was in shock not in tears. just stood there not talking to anyway, i couldnt eat couldnt sleep without picturing him with them while talking to me coming to my house after knowing what he did. and he said that i cheated? i do not whats to ever want to get back with him. i can promise anyone that but i just sometimes wished he never. i just wanted to break up with him. thats all, i didnt want to get hurt like that i would be fine if all we did was break up but knowing that he cheated made me wna crawl up in a ball and hide, i cry just randomly because i just think about it then i think why the hell am i crying? im happy im not with him! im happy i know that my bestfriend wasnt actually my bestfriends. i think im upset because he won. i lost my bestfriend him. im upset. feel rubbish. and hes got loads of girls chasing after him. and theres me feeling useless and just dumped on. i dont talk about him just now and then i think of him. i just really want to see him and look my best and not look at him once! 😀 i want him to beg for me back so i can atleast feel good about myself again. im not being upmyself but im not ugly. atall. i just feel ugly all the time because not being mean but he cheated on me with a girl who wears to much makeup abit overweight im sorry but if your goint to cheat do it with someone that its going to be worth it. WHY ruin a relation for just one slut. but what i dont know is not let him know im thinking about him not say im happy not say im sad. just carry on with life to be honest. my mum just said do not cry, why cry over a boy who did that to you? woah. im so happy to get that all out!