I Dont have depression but somehow i always hated my life and i wanted to end it all. I just want a place to escape my horrible life.I hate it so much. I feel like im trapped in a big black box where there’s no way out. Sometimes I feel like im in a big torture room where no one can hear me scream. Sometimes when i wake up i see scratches on my stomach whenever i have dreams about being on the bottom of a big swinging blade which falls down a couple inches after a few seconds. Everytime i have that dream my ****bag parents wake me up. It feels like a dream and not a nightmare.