I don’t think I’ve actually had any real friends… At the time in my life when you are suppose to start gaining your best friends and people you can trust I was an outcast. I’ve had friends but never anyone who I thought understood me. I’ve also been in love two times before, unhappily, and I guess I hope that if someone loves me they could understand. The two girls I’ve been in love with both turned out to not be wwat I thought they where, I guess love really is blind… and deaf, and until two months ago it has in my experience been mute.
Now when I’ve found someone who I feel understands me, a friend who cares. Someone who feels like she will allways be there. Then what happens, I fall in love with her. I want her to be with me but if she doesn’t develop any feelings for me I think we can still be friends. What I’m afraid of is if she gets feelings for me, and that we sometime in the future break up for some reason, she wouldn’t want to be my friend anymore.
Will love cost me the best friend I’ve ever had?..
-DeviaAnimus