Captivating. is the right word to describe you, once known. to this day, you always have something to say. you never turn me down when i call, i can never NOT call you and tell you whats wrong. i can never NOT think of you when i feel lonely, and like i need someone to be there for me. and i’ve never really been able to give that to you. because i know that im weaker than you, like no matter how much i talk to you, no matter who your girlfriend is. i am not going to stop feeling for you and adoring you the way i did the day i met you and everyday after that. just the concept of knowing i was desired by you, strongly, at some point makes me smile and get nervous and want to drop everything back then so i could give you the happiness you deserved from me, so you could make me as happy as i should have been. to let you know what “us” would have really been like. by the time you even got a taste of “us” it was already too late to make it be the only thing you wanted. i shouldnt have let my feelings for someone else miles away conflict with the bigger posibility of somebody else making me happy all the time, and respecting me, and showing me what love is like. if thats what it would have been.