I want it all to go away
I want all this pain
all this hurt to fade
I want to dissolve in the background
as my favorite melody plays
I want to allow these drips
of tears to just fall off my face
and once I am done
and my face is all puffy
with my eyes all swollen
I want to stop it all
freeze this moment
and tell myself it will be okay
everyday I wake up not wanting
to be here and it’s crazy
because life is beautiful
but I feel so f***ing useless
and so unworthy and I just wish I could
delete myself from even being
here I wish I could take a long vacation
away from everyone but I can’t
that’ll make me selfish and inconsiderate
but does anyone get how it feels
to feel like s*** under someone’s shoe
like damn son
where’s the knife
where’s the gun
because I really need one