My main problem is thinking, I think too much and it sends me into this horrible state of mind that I cannot escape. I have recently been thinking about my father who physically abused me as a child, and my Nana who was only person who loved me with every part of her heart. Ever since she passed away, I have craved her love and affection. I miss her so much, she was practically my mum for the first 10 years of my life, always defending me. Saying that, I never did anything out of the ordinary to deserve what I got, but that isn’t why I’m writing. I hate the thought of someone giving me sympathy for what I have been through, so thats why I can’t talk to anybody about it. I’m just at that part of my life where I wish things were how the used to be, in terms of my old friends that I share such good memories with, and being the careless young me. I guess there isn’t a solution for my problem.