God,
M. is about to get up and go to work. And the incomprehensible rage might come up when she refuses to pey me for the goods and services I've provided her.
I don't understand it but it just happens. I think it is blind rage. It doesn't know anything about anything.
Please protect me from being angry. Your will be done, not mind.
Help her have a good evening at work. Help her to help a lot of people. And help her feel gratified while doing it.
I want to get out of Gods way, I do, I just don't know how. I'm learning how to do it slowly and by very little degrees.
Help God! I don't know how else to describe what I'm going through!?!
Should I order the Opiates Anonymous poster? What is the thing that you are most concerened about me buying?
-The books
-The mal(jal)
– t shirts
– the blind white cane
– the world trade center poster
I don't want to go into detail about why I want all this stuff. It is between God and I. Besides God is already privy to this kind of material. And the more I play the more God works. And I am happy about that.
I just wanted to ask for the guidance of Gods heart before the M. enters the room and leaves and the sorrow starts to beat me up.
Please protect me from the dread of re-calling the trauma of things past. Help me recoveries anonymous, to feel the feelings of grief without acting on them.
Help me die without trying to bring others down with me.
Jesus' name prays,
Amen.
-The Archer