Posted by Anonymous on 2017/08/19 under Love I've come to terms that no boy will ever like me I'm a sophomore and have never had even a boy to tell me he liked me. I'm not trying to be conceded but I think I'm cute; cute clothes nice ass, not completely popular but I talk to and sit w "popular" kids in class but no boy talks to me. I'm not confident enough to make the first move, I don't want to seem desperate. Homecoming is coming up, I don't have a "thing" with anyone so I don't think anyone will ask me. and if he wanted to no one really knows who my group of friends are so they couldn't figure out if I was being asked or not and it SUCKS. I understand that I don't need a man and all that s*** but damn it would be nice to have a shoulder to rest my head on, someone to make out with idk, I feel like I'm not really living the "high school" experience. I haven't had my first kiss either so that doesn't make me feel good I haven't been to a party or a school dance I feel like I'll look back and say you should've lived more. It's the first Friday of the school year and I'm not hanging with anyone it sucks I guess. please tell me how to get a boy plz
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Well, I can’t give you a solution to the problem you are having right now. Because, you know, I’m right there with you.
I’m already older than you are. And yes, I’ve never been kissed and I know excatly what you mean with that feeling of going alone to a party and the longing to be able to lean onto someone. To be able to share with somebody.
But than again, I’ve also seen many of my friends who seem so perfectly happy and suddenly their relationships and marriages fall apart and leave only a huge hurtful mess.
I never was a cute or beautyful girl. I always was shy when it came to boys. In some way I still am. Even though I’m surounded by many people in my private life or at work. People come to me to seek advice or just spend time with me. But I never had the feeling that somebody was interested in me. I thought that I was too boring for someone to love me.
And when I had a crush on sombody I couldn’t find the courage to act on it.
It’s hard. I know. Belive me I do. And as I said I haven’t found a solution to that problem yet.
There are of course those who would say. “Oh, come on! Don’t be so pathetic! Put yourself out there. If you never try to find someone you definately won’t!”
But you know what? You can’t rush love. And you and me. We have to do it at our own pace. It doesn’t matter what others say or what ever idiotic idea the public opinion of “normal” is. Don’t let those others dictate what’s right for you! It is your life. And it is my life. We decide what we do and how we live it! And that’s something really amazing and also really scary.
Even though going alone through it might be harder sometimes. It doesn’t mean that you are not loved by your friends and family. It does not make you less worth than somebody who currently is in a relationship.
Doing things on my own made me stronger and it helped me to feel and to love so much deeper. To appriciate what it can mean to share your life with someone. And when it happens than because I’m ready for it and it will be much better than something you tumble in blindly.
I’m still struggling with being alone from time to time.
But it only means that you and I are doing it our way. Just keep your eyes open. Don’t keep just “waiting” until it happens, but do live your life to the fullest instead. It’s the only way to apreciate your life as the gift that it is. And it’s definatly not a “wasted time” then.
And you know what? Being happy with yourself is quite attractive! Because that has kind of become rare nowadays. And it’s something nobody can take from but you yourself.
Choose to be happy on your own. And don’t jugde yourself for it. Because it’s okay. Sometimes when you stop trying hard to push yourself somewhere, suddenly it just happens without even trying.
Well so many words… What I just wanted to say is…. You are not alone in this little sister. <3