Posted by Anonymous on 2017/08/19 under Love I've come to terms that no boy will ever like me I'm a sophomore and have never had even a boy to tell me he liked me. I'm not trying to be conceded but I think I'm cute; cute clothes nice ass, not completely popular but I talk to and sit w "popular" kids in class but no boy talks to me. I'm not confident enough to make the first move, I don't want to seem desperate. Homecoming is coming up, I don't have a "thing" with anyone so I don't think anyone will ask me. and if he wanted to no one really knows who my group of friends are so they couldn't figure out if I was being asked or not and it SUCKS. I understand that I don't need a man and all that s*** but damn it would be nice to have a shoulder to rest my head on, someone to make out with idk, I feel like I'm not really living the "high school" experience. I haven't had my first kiss either so that doesn't make me feel good I haven't been to a party or a school dance I feel like I'll look back and say you should've lived more. It's the first Friday of the school year and I'm not hanging with anyone it sucks I guess. please tell me how to get a boy plz
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Let me tell you first, you don’t need one. I feel like saying this isn’t fair because I walked in your shoes in Highschool and every time a guy was nice to me I started to find ways to prove he did it because he liked me.
I think I had one-two guys like me, but they were really not the type of guy you’d want to date… if you understand? So I don’t count ’em. So I went through the rest of freshman, sophomore, Junior and Senior year without a boyfriend or rather a second glance from a guy. And that hurt, I had a few friends, but not a group, or a clique. I didn’t belong anywhere though I joined every club I was interested in. I assume I’m coming across emotional and pestamistic in this, but it really was my reality of just floating around from friend to friend and group to group. Never had a niche. So of course I desire to feel wanted, and loved. I didn’t belong anywhere else, but maybe with a guy I would.
This is not your answer. Love is not an excuse to feel better about yourself. You see I’m dating someone right now, someone who I’ve caused pain because I lack confidence elsewhere in my life. I got into a relationship after my freshman year of college, and the complications of our relationship are endless. But I fell in love with him in a time I wanted a relationship, I thought it’d make me more confident in how I looked, and how I felt and did stuff. And it did for a short time, but then the issues started to arise again, you see it in our convos, I apologize for everything, if I make a mistake I apologize, not because I’m afraid he’s going to get mad, but just because I feel like every mistake is just a tack on this bulletin he has in his head. That if I don’t apologize It’ll haunt me later. Granted I have anxiety. I won’t assume you do either. But it’s still an area where I’m not confident in yet, that I can make mistakes and be a flawed human being infront of him. I didn’t learn to accept myself beforehand and thus I’m causing ache on his end, which when you love someone, you never want to be the cause of their pain.
A relationship brings a whole new dimension of issues and worries and stresses. Don’t get into one until you feel like you don’t need one.