Love Work Family Friends Games Kids Life

Posted by on 2020/01/18 under Life

She had a look of slight despondence behind her black shades, sitting two seats in front of me on the top deck of a bus.
She had an Arabic tattoo on the back of her tanned neck and two in roman numerals i think.
Medium dark brown hair up, ear rings high up at the top of her ears, few age lines on the back of her neck. Sexy looking. she had a jean skirt on, a bra lace strap just below her neck to the middle. Rings on both middle fingers, i couldn`t remember the marriage finger, told myself she is definitely married for a good two minutes in my mind and i must forget her, which was a release. From being so obsessed with her. Her skin not perfect but it made her more real to me.
I started feeling aroused imagining my pelvis thrusting into her, how i`m so close to her on this empty bus, she seemed unafraid, maybe she likes me, noticed me, wants me, oh f*** i wish i could just, oh i better stop these thoughts and think of dead animals or human rotted flesh.
To stop myself being so aroused. For a moment i felt sad, knowing i have no balls to approach or ask her out, feeling less of a man, i press the button to get off my stop, walk slowly past her, noticing the sides of her pretty thighs she turns ever so slightly, looking outside, i get off, walk down the road, i see the bus pass me and see her stand up, to get off at the stop just after mine, i look out into the distance to see which direction she went, if she is coming towards me.
She reminded me of a woman i used to know who was snapped up by a big muscular bald guy, she said he had veins over his arms and hands where he worked out so much. When he kissed her she felt all tingles, he is an ex of one of her very beautiful friends, she told her he is ten inches long.
She said she cannot wait to get in bed with him, his touch feels incredible she said he got it all, he is a confident guy.
She always dated tall good looking people, i once asked her if out of a short guy medium guy and a tall guy who would get the first chance of being with her and she said the tall guy gets her first always. It made me feel like s*** that id never be with her, i could only watch and wish i was one of these tall big guys, who were her preference, i was totally down about it, it was a constant drag and there was nothing i could do but feel so insignificantly tiny. I started making up stories in my head about other women not wanting me because im too short, i made up a pet name for myself, calling myself shrimp. I was completely conquered by this woman, whenever a new woman came along,id think she would also want a massive tall muscular giant.
It started when i was at school there was the hottest girl in the school who was a year older,and the tallest boy in my year, seemed to be dating her somehow, oh well he didnt exactly date her, they were just kissing and he was touching her bum and her breasts all night at the local disco. I was shocked and could not get it out of my head, how they were just all over each other in this rabid frenzy of teenage sexuality.I wished i was the guy,i dreamed i was the guy,i imagined i was him so much that i stopped thinking about me, i kinda went into a shell,it was like a kind of depersonalisation. I started masturbating about it, thinking i had his body, his height, his looks, that i was with her, but as him, not as myself, it was a very strange thing to think about, but i just went with it. Then i heard of another guy who was getting some other very beautiful women and i started to imagine and think about if only i was him too, what would i do. These two hot shots were making out with the hottest girls in the area, these girls grew up to be women who were still chasing these tall hotshots who turned into men. Nothing ever changed, we all just got older. It just seemed like those early school days molded me, molded me to wish i was someone else, so badly that i even imagined their genitals instead of my own going into them. This was before i ever found a healthy partner or love, so i had no idea what love was, i just thought it was sex and that equaled love. Like it was the luck of the draw or something, that the lucky ones who have the right height or confidence or coolness seem to get the girls and everyone else gets nothing. It seemed a horrid black and white world for most of us, in my opinion

Leave a Reply

Name and Mail are optional. Your email address is however required if you want to subscribe to the comments (see below)

This site uses User Verification plugin to reduce spam. See how your comment data is processed.

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.