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Posted by on 2019/03/17 under Life

Why do I just exist? I drain myself daily making sure everyone is okay. I'm the shoulder to cry on when you need it. Everyone now pushes me away and depends on others. Everyone's problems, anxiety, depression, etc is better than mine. Always has been that way. I have trouble opening up, but the second I do, I just exist again. No one f***ing cares about my feelings, emotions, thoughts… my own husband would rather be that crying shoulder to our friends, he's tired of me "constantly complaining and repeating" myself… I've pushed my thoughts and feelings into the depths of my heart for so long, I've forgotten what's it's like to NOT feel numb. I just want out. I just want a friend who won't take advantage of my heart. I want a friendship where we can just give each other a look, in silence, and just understand how we're feeling and never judge. I'm tired of being/feeling worthless every hour of every day of every month of every year I'm unfortunately breathing. I WANT OUT!

2 thoughts on “worthless

  1. kalirablack says:

    Where would you like to go, if you could choose?

  2. kalirablack says:

    I’m sorry about the last comment. Maybe it wasn’t exactly the right question to ask.

    And I’m not sure if I can say some worthy things.

    Please, relax. At least, this website is where you can put out all the pressure you’re under right now. You can always come here.

    :/ I know there are always people that don’t care about us.
    I’ve seen some saying today, and it does make some sense to me.
    Don’t overly care about, or take care of anyone , because you guys are equal.

    I like a world where people just care about each other, and I do wish to live in a world like this.
    But somehow, this world seems to be cruel enough that, most people just take advantage of the way you care about them.

    Please, be nice to yourself.
    When you don’t want to help a selfish friend, then don’t, if you don’t feel like to.

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