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Posted by on 2012/03/08 under Uncategorized

You know that one person who you love the most want to be with they are your everything. And You can’t have them. Just when the feelings have almost subsided, poof they come back all at once to only have kerosene poured on everything and to have a someone light a match and all you can do is stare at the flames and watch everything burn right in front of you and you can’t stop it. Almost like being sucker punched in the stomach and kicked in the chest. Then you just go into normal routine, but when you get up in the morning you realize that they’re not there. You’re all alone. You know you have fears. the silly ones, afraid of the dark afraid of spiders, needles. THe silliest one of them all. I’m scared of being alone. That scares me. But i guess i’ll just have to deal with being alone. It hurts so much. He says its not that i dont wanna be with you i’m afraid of hurting you. He doedsnt realize that he’s hurting me by not. It is like someone is ripping through my insides. but what else is new.Looks like putting on my happy face in the morning and smile at work even though im breaking down on the inside. Here comes the same routine again. All i want is to be happy. I guess thats to much to ask. OH well. Gotta fight through it right? I know doubt anyone will read this. I just afraid of being alone like worse than my fear of needles. But sometimes you just have to face your fears.

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