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Posted by on 2017/11/12 under Life

Hey anyone!

who decides to read this pessimistic blog about how i feel like a loser just because i don't have, actually, don't want to do anything on this Saturday night. I just feel like going home, taking off all these clothes that feel like weights and just jump into a comfortable spot on the bed or couch and just relax. Unwind from the long and tedious things of our everyday lives. Go into a trace like state and just release everything that has been crammed inside my head. I want the words of my ancestors to come through the ends of my fingers and let them be the vessels that they can speak. Let the words of the past arise and give us wisdom so we do not repeat history.

Sorry, before finding this website i smoked a bit of weed so that i could get the creative juices a flowin.

Anyways lets get back to feeling like a loser. YES, let me sulk in this puddle of boredom.

I feel … ugh confused, angry, in love, mad , anxious, determined, robbed, i feel a lot of things and i just don't know why i'm having the issue of processing each of them? Why do i feel nothing now? Why do I not urn for something specifically? why does it have to be so vague. Its as though i know that nothing really exist and so nothing really matters….. I've been watching way to much Matrix. Anyways, yeah thats just how i feel, and no I'm not depressed.

If you actually knew me, you can always catch me with a smile, i don't know why i cannot stay mad for a long period of time. I believe its because i analyze the situation through a bigger prospective than just what the issue is at the moment, even though i might not agree at that point in time, i know that overall we still have the same goal or objective, so just forgive and forget and continue on the way of good.

So tonight even though i'm not with my boyfriend, (he's out doing some redneck things with his Mississippi cousins whose visiting ) and i'm alone on the floor trying to get all the pretty voices out from inside my head.

This has been fun, i don't feel like a loser anymore, i cant wait to write some more.

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